Higher Self: How to Know and Connect 

Home > 4 Steps to Using Projection to Heal > Higher Self: How to find and connect

Higher Self is the best version of ourselves which holds the highest vibration and knows everything about our soul's journey.

It’s been inside us all along.

It knows what our life lessons are, what we came here for, and what are our highest possible potentials is in this life time.

We are living in duality to learn the soul’s lessons. There are things that we can only learn through human experiences. So, we need to go through challenges along the way. Only by breaking out of our small shell and stepping out of our comfort zone to challenge something new can we bring ourselves to the higher version of ourselves.

And maybe I can say this:

  The goal of spiritual healing is to return to who we really are and start living life as the Higher Self.

Our Higher Self is the one who navigates us throughout the entire process by sending us messages we need so that we can learn our lessons in the most effective way and eventually become able to manifest the best version of ourselves.

Some people call it intuition, others may call it gut feeling. Or maybe we can call it wisdom or inner-knowing.

When something is aligned with our highest good, we naturally feel good, happy and fulfilled. It's a sign that we are on the right track.

And when we feel that something is not quite right, it's a sign that we need to have a dialogue with ourselves. The Higher Self is trying to tell us something. And it's up to us whether we listen to it or not.

The Quickest Way to Connect to Your Higher Self

Is probably to “Stay True to Yourself and Always Speak Your Truth”

It may be the same as listening to, and following, your gut feeling (or heart) and express your authentic self.

When you feel something is not quite right, there is always a very important message underneath. Even though someone is saying otherwise, and it doesn't matter who it is, if it doesn't feel quite right to you, you need to ask yourself once again, “What is the message?”

There won't be anyone else who you should listen to. You should only listen to your own voice.

Having said that, it's not easy. To do this, we first need to get truly independent. Meaning disentangling ourselves from others energetically. It's so very easy to get lost in each other because of fear.

But to connect to our inner-selves, we must go beyond it.

Know Your True Potentials

Now if we want to know what the best version of ourselves is... the simplest way is to use positive projection.

Because we only see what we have inside reflected in the outside world. That is just how it works. Some people project their Higher Selves (or Ideal Selves) on to a Spiritual Guru, which is a typical positive projection. When I see someone with grace, I can recognize it because I also have that aspect inside me, but they may not be aware of it.

And unless we reclaim our projection both positive and negative, there still will be fear based separation inside us. The more integrated we become, the more mature (Higher Self) we become.


  • Think about someone who you admire
  • Write down the positive aspects of this person

It gives you a good idea of your highest potentials.

And then:

  • Reclaim and choose to own those positive aspects as yours
  • Try finding evidence or proofs that support your new reality (that these aspects are yours)
  • Start living life with these aspects, become the one by living them

Then, and only then, you can let go of attachments to this person. One step closer to true individuation as your Higher Self.

Please also read these related articles:

Look at Areas Where You Have Problems

The area you have most problems with is probably where your highest potentials are. Like I said earlier on this page, we are learning something through duality. 

In my case, learning how to express myself in an appropriate way is one of my soul’s lessons, so I had to (still do) struggle a lot in the communication area. Only through this experience, can I become able to know who I am and to express myself in the best possible way.

It is the way we learn and establish our true strengths and it is different from person to person.

If you have some obvious repeating pattern(s) in one or more areas of your life, that can most probably tell you what your highest potentials are.


There are mainly two big obstacles in our way to manifest our Higher Self.

  • Fear
  • Tendency to avoid the feeling of pain

These two are strong and they are not easy to overcome. We humans tend to take an easy way out. Yet, it is as if we are postponing home work to the last day of summer holidays, it’s better facing it sooner, rather than later.

Some very common fears are…

Fear of:

  • Being alone
  • Being abandoned
  • Not being liked
  • Not being approved
  • Being excluded
  • Being judged

And they are what bond and limit us in the illusions.

Mind Healing and Emotional Healing can help ease this a lot. Also, you need to know that getting rid of fear completely isn't our final goal, because that will just be impossible.

Rather, just know that the fears are phantoms from the past. Every time you find yourself caught up in fear or anxiety, just bring more awareness and be Present with it. It will shine more light on your unconscious mind.

Tendency to avoid the feeling of pain is ego's primary function can lead us to addictions or escapism such as smoking, drinking, eating, shopping, sex, socializing... And I would also like to add co-dependancy and narcissism relationship as a form of avoidance of feeling pain. Please read Emotional Healing and Core Wound for more detail. 

Healing core wounds takes rather a long time. And it can be painful. And only way is to confront your pain. Loneliness, emptiness, nothingness, and so on. We cannot keep escaping forever. If we ever wan to live our life as truly independent and sovereign being, this is what it takes. So, let's do it.

Spiritual Healing is not only about feeling pain. If that is so, no one wants to do it. But it is for us to live life in a lot more fulfilling ways. We are here to shine our lights and become whole again. Welcome back to wholeness :-)

Related Articles:

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